tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8913308670961435636.post3815371439559224896..comments2024-03-07T04:01:00.008-04:00Comments on miss fancy pants (the bride): ready or not, here we comeUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8913308670961435636.post-17772137964962414182010-03-19T00:04:48.354-03:002010-03-19T00:04:48.354-03:00I didn't "just know" either. I think...I didn't "just know" either. I think it's all a leap of faith. And faith in another person is hard to have if you've been burned before.<br /><br />But being on the other side, and having had all these same thoughts as you before, let me tell you it's better over on this side. I feel sure now.Mrs Thttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03367631935043016430noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8913308670961435636.post-24598250219518205002010-03-18T19:21:13.302-03:002010-03-18T19:21:13.302-03:00I have the same fears. I think it's common rea...I have the same fears. I think it's common really, and also a healthy sign that you are aware of the commitment you're making. The common thread I've seen in good marriages around me is awareness of each other and the choice they've made, and then making that choice every day, even when it's difficult. I think that's really the best anyone can do.kchttp://www.shinyprettybits.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8913308670961435636.post-38393383504963453142010-03-18T15:33:03.134-03:002010-03-18T15:33:03.134-03:00Same here. Very confused about this topic, actuall...Same here. Very confused about this topic, actually, and have been most of my life. I've come to the point where I feel confident and happy (really happy) about marrying my guy, but I still worry... and I don't think any test or quiz will give me the certainty I want (though like you mentioned, I do feel like I have good circumstantial evidence ;)). <br /><br />I know so many couples who professed to feeling the same way, and then *poof*, they didn't. Now I don't think love and commitment are really a matter of luck/chance/magic... but nobody knows what he future holds and people DO change - I've already changed a lot in the 10 years since I was 17... what makes me think I'll be the same/feel the same when I'm 37? <br /><br />I have a... mental block? when it comes to divorce in the personal sense. I know, logically, that sometimes it makes more sense than being miserable (and of course, cheating and abuse are two things I would not tolerate), but I also feel strongly (irrationally?) that I never, ever want to get divorced. And I don't know why I feel that way -- I'm not religious at all. And I know life is short and somtimes I'm not sure I believe that life-long monogomy makes sense, biologically speaking. Sometimes I also wonder why we, as a culture, sort of fetishize the idea of staying in love with one person for 50+ years. (Other times, I feel like we pay too much heed to the pursuit of personal happiness and 100% fufillment, when honestly, we're incredibly privileged to even be pondering such questions).<br /><br />And yet. I want to believe that we can sustain this love.<br /><br />What confuses me is: doesn't everyone? So what happens? Sigh. The thing is, whether we made it official or not, my guy and I already decided that we want to TRY to stay with each other forever, so the marriage thing makes it more public, but the riskiness-yet-hopefulness of our commitment has existed for a long time.<br /><br />Anyway, love discussing this topic and feel somehow encouraged to know I'm not alone. :)Maggiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13537148941452235301noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8913308670961435636.post-76044781492418022672010-03-18T12:10:02.527-03:002010-03-18T12:10:02.527-03:00I feel the say way. How do I know I am going to st...I feel the say way. How do I know I am going to still feel this way in 10 years? 20? 40?<br /><br />It is terrifying, but not crippling. If anything, I think divorce makes me feel better about marriage. If I screw up, it could be embarassing, humbling, etc, but it isn't permanent. If he starts cheating on me or hitting me, or even if I decide I love someone else, there is an exit.Cupcake Weddinghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02808981371272030390noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8913308670961435636.post-12967800636319871512010-03-18T11:10:54.979-03:002010-03-18T11:10:54.979-03:00I worry about divorce too, my parents are divorced...I worry about divorce too, my parents are divorced and I've seen friends divorce before their 30th birthday. But ultimately marriage is a crap shoot, there are no guarantees all you can do is try your hardest to make it work and have faith.Shannonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04356655617475615318noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8913308670961435636.post-87994515484787035802010-03-18T09:44:00.800-03:002010-03-18T09:44:00.800-03:00not judging at all. we are going through kind of a...not judging at all. we are going through kind of a rough patch now about how my fiance's parent's divorce affected him. i think you are very smart to go into this thinking about things like divorce and how to make everything work. the more real something is (or the closest to the date), the more you want to make sure everything is in order to make it last and make the right decisions. good luck!<br /><br />also, i love quizzes so totally not judging :)Lisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16968993895571206033noreply@blogger.com