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Wednesday, June 16, 2010

wedding porn addiction

As most brides (and some grooms for that matter) know, wedding inspiration is addictive.

For me, it started with The Knot but I soon realized that most of the photos on there were either out of reach for us financially speaking or simply didn't mesh with our tastes. Though I was stuck in the traditional wedding mindset for the first 6 months of our engagement, photos from traditional magazines and websites never seemed right to me because they often didn't match my love of all things handmade, crafty, colorful, and rustic.

Shortly after that, I discovered the world of wedding blogs. And although I am eternally grateful that I did because blogs like A Practical Wedding, Offbeat Bride and 2000 Dollar Wedding offered me a great sense of perspective which I desperately needed, they also provided something else that consumes thousands of engaged people: wedding porn.

Beautiful photos of lavish weddings with every detail meticulously thought out and carefully executed are scattered throughout the wedding blog world. It's so pretty and so inspiring, but it's also scary. On one hand, I will be forever grateful that I had so much wedding inspiration because it allowed us to add details (like a photo booth and tissue paper pom poms) to our wedding that we may not have thought to add otherwise.

On the other hand, however, it has the ability to drive me completely nuts when I see projects that I simply must recreate. It took me a long time to realize that the handmade, DIY details of wedding blogs is just as addictive as the $40,000+ weddings featured on The Knot. This is especially true for me because I often refuse to pay for anything if I think I can do it myself. I knew I could make my own jewelery, decorations for the tent, ring pillow... the list goes on and on. If I thought for a second that I had the ability to make tablecloths, I gladly would have made some rather than pay $10 to rent one.

So when I open up my blog feed and see tons of blogs that are consistently featuring weddings with mondofabulous details, I get excited and try to add more things to my to-do list. It's the kid in the candy store complex. Let me tell you, the "wedding folder" on my computer is full of projects that I would love to have at our wedding. Unfortunately, with 11 days to go, there simply isn't time. Or energy.

Given this time and energy constraint, I've decided to remove some of the inspiration-only sites that consume my mind. As much as I love the inspiration that comes from wedding shoots like this one (*swoon*), it's time to let go of the details that we don't have the time, energy or (let's face it) money to complete this close to the wedding.

Part of me is sad to see them go and part of me is ridiculously relieved because I'm already up to my ears in DIY projects. Although it sounds like I'm complaining, I know I wouldn't have it any other way. I love making things and I love the fact that our wedding will consist of things that I've made or that were made through a joint effort through the help of family, friends and Mr. FP.

There's no regrets here, I just realized that I need to stop before I go completely nuts. Remember the whole idea of "keeping it simple"? Yeah, what the hell happened to that? Here's to hoping that the downsized blog feed will help us to return to that.

13 comments:

Lisa said...

Kudos for prioritizing! I had to do the same thing. You won't even care when you get to your special day, and even less after its all over. No doubt it will be amazing! Its almost here!

JEM - Aqua Bride said...

My goodness, I feel the same way. I feel I can DO every DIY project since after I see how easy or cheap it is to make, I can't justify spending the money. I realize as well that i'll have to start taking things off my list.

Becky said...

I'm pretty sure that by the time you calculate the cost of my DIY projects, I could have saved money by ordering pre-made alternatives. Eek!

Hi-Fi Weddings said...

i could only imagine being engaged in this time. blogs weren't as popular 4 years ago, which i'm kinda grateful for lol. cause i would be the same way! there are so many cute ideas everywhere! but kudos to you for remembering what it's all about! and yay for the upcoming day!!! :) xoxo

Sarah said...

I should not have clicked on the link to the blue wedding you love. Now I have an overwhelming need to embroider my own damn ringbearer's pillow, and I don't embroider. Oof. (Entirely aware that I have just missed the point of your very eloquent post about not getting caught up in the pretty, a sentiment with which I wholeheartedly agree. Except that silly pillow is just so darned pretty.)

GM said...

I did something similar a month or so ago and I now only read blogs by real brides like you. Time to buckle down and focus on how my wedding is going to be, instead of how it could be if I took on a hundred extra projects.

Lace.and.Likes. said...

oh wedding porn.
its a killer

Hindsight Bride said...

Oh honey I hear ya! I'm sure you know about A Practical Wedding. I love the eye candy too, but also need a little APW to put things in perspective.

lyn said...

I, too, had to do this. It was just not worth my mental sanity. Of course, it was perhaps easier for me, because I am not as cool and industrious as you at cranking out the projects. :)

But still. Sanity above all.

Miss C said...

Yay for prioritising!

I am already at the stage, but I think I'm just really lazy. Everything seems too hard after I think about it for a couple of days.

Amberdawn said...

So true, I'm totally addicted to wedding porn. I'm glad in a way that I started early, because I got the perfect photo shoot envy out of my system. Now I mostly read about real bride's weddings, from budget to moderately priced. But even still, I have SO many different escort cards/seating chart ideas saved, I worry about narrowing it down!

Lisa said...

hooray! clearly I second pretty much everything in this post! lets toast to a simpler happy fun wedding and a happy lovey wedding planning period!

Ms. Bunny said...

Eleven days! Woo! You are so close and I think turning off the wedding porn outlets is a good idea.

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